I'm in Las Vegas,Trick!!

.....Well, not yet...lol. I'm FINALLY going to LAS VEGAS, for the FIRST time in my adult life(stop laughing).I'm BEYOND excited!!! I'm going for my Best Friend's 24th birthday, with some of our closest friends. I can NOT wait to see what all the talk is about as far as Vegas goes. My plans: Party EVERY night that we are there,Laying out by the pool, Meeting cute boys,Having brunch/Mimosa's,Shopping, and just having a BLAST!! This trip is sure to be a VERY memorable one!! I'm gunna get loose and just have as much fun as I can fit into every minute of EVERY day that I am there!!

I had an EPIPHANY....

I WANT TO BE MARRIED BY THE TIME I'M 30.....@LEAST engaged.
All of my friends are on such different pages as far as the whole dating thing goes.I am 24, with a son, and am at a point where I am ready to get down to business....I'm no longer looking for TEMPORARY relationships(what is the point if it won't last??) And, I REFUSE to settle in the least bit. I will COMPROMISE, but I will NOT settle.I ONLY look for/expect from people what I feel like I can offer back.I honestly think I'm a good catch, but hey, we're supposed to think that about ourselves,right?? lol. All jokes aside, by the time im 30, I want to at least be engaged to the man I will marry....I want to be someone's wife, one day, I wanna be part of a team, I want to "complete someone's puzzle", I want the white picket fence, I want it ALL, damn it! My mother(biological) was married like 5 times(could NEVER be me) and my OTHER mom (the one who raised me) NEVER married.Aside from my brother, I had no example of what a "healthy" relationship was and I think that was a huge part of why I would stay single for so long, I didn't know what to do!! Needless to say, I've learned quite a bit and am ready to learn MORE.....this is A LOT coming from the girl who "doesn't want a boyfriend", I know....but things change, and so do people....We'll see how I feel about all of this tommorow...lol

Tips to a '5-Minute Face'

We've all had one of those days where we were in a hurry,were running late,didn't have much time on our hands, BUT needed to do our makeup. here is the way I create my '5-minute-face', when 5 minutes is LITERALLY all I have.

*Apply concealer to any blemishes/red spots that need it, and to under eye circles, if need be.
*Fill in brows, I usually do so with an eyebrow pallete(E.L.F. has a really good one) or with Maybeline Define a Brow (if you prefer Pencil).Make sure your strokes are very light to ensure a natural look, and AFTER you have filled your brows in, ALWAYS use a "spoolie"(it's like a CLEAN/UNUSED mascara wand) to brush your brows to soften any harsh lines/get rid of any excess product.
*MASCARA-MASCARA-MASCARA!! Even if I leave home with a completely bare face, I curl my lashes/use at LEAST 2 coats of mascara to give me that "wide-eyed" look
*Powder-Normally, when I do my entire face(my normal routine,including foundation) I use MAC's pressed powder because it's lightweight and gives you an amazing finish
-Side note: ALWAYS use a fluffy brush, when applying ANY powder for an even finish.
*Lip Gloss/Lip Stick. As of late, my signature lip has been a pink one.It isn't too bright(which makes it wearable for work,ect) and it isn't too light/sheep(which makes me feel pretty without feeling too loud) a nude lip is also a great go-to lip when you don't have a lot of time on your hands for application(I normally do my lips in the car,any ways...lol)
*Blush or Bronzer....whenever you are doing such a simple face, you ALWAYS want to exagerate or "highlight" a feature so that you look "put together" Blush is an amazing thing, and I honestly think it adds the perfect amount of color to your look.

So THIS is the way I create my 5-minute face, that has gotten me through sooooo many time crunches,last minute plans,ect. To each his own, but I really hope this helps you!!

Stay Beautiful, Bellas!!

Age-Proof Your Eyes

If you are like me (and about 90% of the world) you suffer from at least a LITTLE bit of disclororation around the eye(also know as Dark Circles). I have been trying for a while now, to find a fix.....here are some tricks/tips that have been tried and true for me in HELPING(not getting rid of, completely) my problem. Please try some of these trick and let me know how the work for you!

• Use your RING finger when apply eye creams,or concealers(IF you don't use a brush)
  

Why:It's weaker than your index or middle finger.Touching your eyes with a stronger
finger/too much preassure can stretch out the thin skin around the eye

• "Wear Tea"Steep 2 tea bags,let them cool,wrap each bag in 2 paper towels and place a bag over each CLOSED eye for 5 to 15 minutes. Why:Green,Black and chamomile teas have astringents that constrict blood vessels and pull skin "taut" I personally, have only used green tea(it's the only kind of tea, i had...lol)and I can honestly say that this actually worked. I did it every other day, for like 8 days and I saw a difference.

• Peel a Potato.Peel and grate a potato (raw) and then mash it(it will be kind of hard, but a rule of thumb is;the more liquid you gan get from "mashing" the potatoe, the better) wrap the "mashings" in a CLEAN dishcloth (spread it as if you are spreading mayo on bread, so that the cloth is covered lengthwise, making it so that you only need ONE pouch to cover BOTH eyes) Lie down and place the pouch over your eyes for 15 minutes

Why:Potatoe starch has anti-inflammatory properties, so it's amazing4soothing/irratation

• Sleep on you BACK. Impossible for me, but according to a friend of mine, this method is tried and true.Try sleeping Face up,and add an extra pillow to prevent fluid from pooling in your face which causes eye redness/puffiness(sounds so obvious,right?)

Why: If you're on your side or stomach, the pressure of your head pressed against the
pillow for hours can cause permanent creases around your eyes.


Simply put, as in everything; PREVENTION is key. Having a great skincare regime is key to youthful eyes.There are tons of products on the market that are specifically for helping to prevent/reverse skin discoloration. A line that I am VERY fond of is SkinCeuticals. They are an AMAZING brand that is focused on PREVENTION of ANY and ALL skin problems....they also have tons of products that focus on "Correcting" any problems that you may not have been able to "Prevent". Let me say, also that in MY opinion, the reason this brand is AMAZING(aside from the results you get from the products) is because the are soooooo gentle and VERY natural. The sell the BEST facial cleanser I have EVER used...it's called "Simply Clean" and believe me, the name says it all. At first, I was thrown off by the fact that the "cleanser" didn't foam...no bubbles?!?!?! NO! And guess what, My face has never felt cleaner. The price isn't too budget friendly....It's $30 a bottle.(F.Y.I. it IS a "Spa Brand" which means, if you go to a spe for a facial, you can feel free to ask for samples....the eye product come in "sample sizes" that have at LEAST 5 uses per sample, which is amazing)but enough about that...lol. The eye products that I used were: Eye Cream,Eye Renewal,and the Eye Gel aox+......ALL amazing products, If I had to recommend one above the others, I would have to go with the "Eye Renewal Gel".....it's under $40, you apply it before bed so it works while you sleep,it isn't very harsh which means it is ok for people with sensitive eyes all-inall, this is an amazing product. I hope all(@ least SOME) of this works for you.If you have any tips/tricks, please comment and let me know them!! Until next time, Stay Beautiful!!

Girlie Tip of the Day

In order to maintain your fragrance ALL DAY: LAYER your Scent!

1. Start this process in the shower. I am a woman who doesn't feel clean by using Body Wash alone, so when I want to layer my scent, I will use body wash AFTER I use my soap(Dove sensitive skin,which is fragrance free)Body wash will be your first "layer" of your scent
2. Body Lotion/Body Cream(the same fragrance,of course) I preffer lotions during hotter weather because they are not too heavy. But, I preffer body CREAMS in colder weather OR before bed. They work wonders over night, to help achieve Butter Soft skin....ESPECIALLY after shaving. **TIP:apply lotions or body creams while skin is still kind of wet to lock in moisture
3. Body Spray/Perfume. Apply Body mist or Perfume as your last "layer" Body mists; I have a 5 spray rule;no more than 5 sprays(you don't want too much) and perfume use no more than 3 since perfumes are a lot heavier.

Fragrant Oils have been big with me, too.Forever 21 sells some pretty good
ones that are pretty inexspensive and you don't need to re-apply.


I hope this works for you guys!! Until Next time, Stay Beautiful,Bellas!!

The past doesn't ALWAYS stay there....

So,anyone who knows me on even a semi-personal level, knows that I am a person who doesn't dwell on the past. I'm all about MOVING FORWARD and letting go of things/people/situations that are not the best for you.Case in point: My last "boyfriend"/Relationship.This relationship was not a good one. Don't get me wrong, I liked dude(and at one point, I even thought I LOVED him....silly me)and to say we never had good times would be a lie. We DEF did......BUT we also had BAD times. VERY BAD. I was in that situation for a while(a LOT longer than I should have been) and in that time, I dealt with EVERYTHING......anything you can think of, anything that YOU have ever been through with/taken from a man, I DID TOO. BUT, after countless tears,so many fights,so many lies,so many women,too many arguments,countless "I deserve better than this", I MOVED ON......I broke free. I LET GO. Never did I doubt that this man loved me....I KNEW he did....the way he would say it,the way he looked at me, and SOMETIMES in the way he treated me. BUT underneath all of that "love" was still "that" person. The person who couldn't fathom being faithful. The person who loved me, just not enough to give me what he and all his friends knew I needed/deserved.So after all was said and done, after he begged me to stay with him while he "worked on himself",after he begged for another chance. I thought he had finally gotten the point:We were done......FOR GOOD. Not the case at all....this dude has been calling,texting,Emailing me, claiming to be "ready"....ready for what?? ME......pssshhhhh. Too little too late, honey bun. They say you don't know what you've got til it's gone....this must be true.The funny thing is that through everything he put me through, I never strayed....NOT ONCE. I thought that I was done with that chapter of my life....hell, I AM done. So why can't the past stay there? Why does it take losing someone, for a person to understand a person's true value? It baffles my mind....now Im dealing with a person that I want nothing to do with, who is convinced we should be together. One thing about me is that I have a forgiving heart and I can't hold grudges BUT once I dead you, it's for good. He's dead to me. I feel like I'm rambling so I will end it with this:Don't treat your "treasures" like trash.....love those that love you.Don't break the heart that beats for you! and remember that the grass is hardly ever REALLY greener on the other side! It's greener where ever you take the time to "water " and take care of it.Love those that love you....period. J Bellz

Don't just GO through life, GROW through life =0)

Truth Is....

1.There is so much that I want to say on a day to day basis, but I don't out of fear of being misunderstood/judged.
2. I am one of the shyest women you will ever meet. YES, I have a million pictures of myself,YES I always have something to say, but I am VERY shy.
3. I'm MUCH better in group settings...in a group setting I flourish, but 1 on 1?!?!?! Forget about it
4.I second guess myself A LOT and because of this,I also tend to short hand myself...I'm working on that.
5. When I Love, I Love HARD, and I NEVER expect ANYTHING more or less than I give/am willing to give in return
6. I can find "good" in everyone....DEF a gift & a curse
7.I'd walk through fire,before I knowingly hurt someone I love or I knew Loved me
8. My voice knows no "medium" tone...Im either really quiet or really loud
9.I have a "nervous"laugh...I laugh when I am nervous or uncomfortable
10.The smallest things make me happy...you'd be surprised at the things that put a smile on my face on a day to day basis
11. I'm such a cupcake...I cry over the smallest things,sometimes
12.Birds scare me more than dogs do...I actually LOVE dogs
13.Becoming a mother is honestly the best thing that has happend to me. Ive grown soooooo much,am a much stronger person,I think twice(once for myself and once for him) about EVERYTHING that I do
14.I can't hold a grudge for anything,BUT once I decide to cut you off,you're cut off for good....it's just that simple with me
15. My son is the cheese to my macaroni,the turkey bacon to my turkey bacon blt,the miracle whip to my turkey sandwich,the ice cream to my milkshake,the ketchup on my french fries,the marshmallow to my rice krispy treat....what I'm trying to say is that he is the very BEST part of me. He is amazing,by far,my BIGGEST Blessing and I thank God for him EVERYDAY.
16.I feel like I'm unbreakable, Ive dealt with IT ALL.....if I haven't broken yet, I peobably won't

Moneygami...Pure DOPENESS...In MY book, at least

I don't know who's behind these, but they are pretty freaking dope to me.If YOU know who is responsible for this tender triumph (hur hur),please let me know.Unless the truth is that some hick is sitting around in his trailer making these,because there is nothing else to do when you watch the desert from a desk chair.That would totally KILL my fantasy of some nimble fingered sweat shop kid who came up with this semi-news worthy talent to help get his family out of the slums..........Am I a "Visionary" or WHAT?!?!?! (Think Raising Arizona meets Slumdog Millionaire) So anyway,I'm guessing this is nothing amazing,that a whole lot of other people can do this too, but whatever.....as someone with the dexterity of a freaking chimp(okay, it's not THAT bad) this kind of thing AMAZES me.

Simply put.....Gracefully said........

"I believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to LET GO. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they go right.You believe lies so that you learn to trust NO ONE but yourself, and sometimes things fall apart so that BETTER things can come together
-Marilyn Monroe

Single vs. Singular...do you know the difference??If so, which one are YOU??

So, a few weeks ago, I was having a DEEP conversation with one of my good friends who like me, is SINGLE and COMPLETELY content.We were comparing/contrasting the main factors as to why(why we THINK,at least) we ARE single. She starts out by saying(admitting,for the FIRST time,to me) that what she regretted the most about her last relationship is the way she feels she "lost herself" in the process of TRYING to find herself in her then boyfriend.I was blown away and a little ashamed by the fact that I could Identify...not 100%, but I knew where she was coming from, and I'm sure every woman breathing can too.The "thing" about me, is that I am a "people pleaser" by nature. I ALWAYS want to see someone I care about with a smile on their face. I wanna BE the reason they smile! The thing that I've learned,through my very OWN trail and error is that: you should ONLY give what is given back to you in return.......PERIOD. Your OWN happiness should NEVER take the backseat to anyone else's.....PERIOD. I asked her how/why she felt she had lost so much of herself in the midst of the relationship that wasn't even a year long. This is where it got good. She said that she compromised HERSELF,her likes,her desires,her ambitions,her IDENTITY to become exactly what she THOUGHT he wanted.Tisk-Tisk-Fucking Tisk!!I can say that I have DEF been known to compromised LITTLE things in my life/about myself to become more "fitting" for my mate....but JOLANDA stays JOLANDA.....at LEAST a solid 90% of me.I see nothing wrong with "fixing" certain things about yourself to make things easier or more enjoyable for your guy but you should NEVER lose yourself in the process!! Case in point: I had an ex who was very into sports....Football,especially. Do I look like I know the first thing about football??I think not...BUT while in that specific relationship, I knew what team drafted what player,his favorite team,what players were out,how long they were out, ect. I did this because it was something HE liked, and I liked HIM, and I wanted him to know that we could share that thing together....HE loved it because he knew I was doing it just for him.Little things like that, I think are okay, but things like changing your appearance, which she did(cut off/dyed her hair.....there's just NO way I would....)changing your religion(she considered) and other things that mean a lot to you, and that you know that you would NEVER change on your OWN are NOT OKAY. That being said, let me get into the title of this post,what I mean by the wuestion and what's behind it.

Single-adj. Not accompanied by another or others; solitary
a) unmarried b)lacking a partner c)of or relating to celibacy

Singular-adj. Being only one; individual
Being one of a kind; unique
Being beyond what is ordinary or usual; remarkable, unusual, odd

Karrine Steffans, in her book "The Vixen Manual" talks about how important it is to STAY "singular", Even while IN a relationship. This, I believe is the BIGGEST component in "keeping" yourself. What I mean by this, is: stay true to yourself. Keep YOU in tact. Treat yourself as good while WITH him, as you did when you were WITHOUT him. Don't EVER give someone else the key to your happiness.......EVER! The women who give all of themselves to a man are the women who, after a breakup, can't get out of bed for weeks, feel like they want to die without him.THOSE are the women who get in relationships and take sooooo much b.s. that the normal woman would NEVER.You don NOT want to be that woman, and if you have been "her" before, I trust that you don't EVER want to go back!

Back to my Original Question; do YOU consider yourself SINGLE or SINGULAR?

I, personally, consider myself BOTH....reasons being: I am single;unmarried,lacking a partner and I am VERY individual.....those things make me VERY single...lol. But, on the not so flip-side, I am "odd".....I ALWAYS feel like the "odd cookie" for being sinlge, amongst my friends.....almost all the way single. I say "almost all they way single" because there IS someone who has my interest and I know that if the time was right and details were in order, I would not be single. I'm saying, I'm single by CHOICE(In MY book;singular) not by force, which is often assumed about single women, BLACK women, especially; that if she is single, it's because she can't find/keep a man....NOT always the case....ESPECIALLY in MY case. I am single for a few reasons; I WANT TO BE, being the first/MAIN reason.2. I don't have what it takes to be in a healthy,long-lasting relationship, right now. I mean I have it(somewhere deep down inside me), but I don't WANT to give that to anyone, right now.3. I need to feel "worthy" of a relationship, and right now, I don't; I dont want to ever feel like a "benchwarmer"...I want to be a part of the winning team! I don't mind being a "cheerleader"...thats me NATURALLY, but I do NEED to spend some time on the "court" and carry my weight; remind my "coach" why he "drafted" me in the first place..lol. Im happy that I am in a place in my life, where I can acknowledge/accept the fact that now is not my time to be in a relationship.....so single, I shall stay.....and even when I DO decide to change my Relationship status on FaceBook......I will STILL remain SINGULAR.

Better late than Never.....right?

So, I've FINALLY done it!! I've started a BLOG!!! Yay me, right?!?!?! I know! This has been a long time coming, I know. Truth is, I've been pondering the idea of starting a blog for the longest time(I actually started one in 09, and was so unsure of myself that the blog just sat)but I was all over the place as far as what I wanted my blog to focus on. I was thinking "Hair,makeup,fashion" but then there was the question"who died and made ME a fucking "expert"?"....I'm just saying....Needless to say that a year later and about 6 notches in my "confidence belt"later, I will say(and proudly so) that I made me a fucking "expert"...lol. All jokes aside, this blog will be a huge combination of things:fashion,beauty tips/as well as questions,fashion/beauty faux paus(in MY book,at least),News,music,Random thoughts,Poems(if Im feeling saucy...lol)rants and MORE randomness...lol. I have no "blueprint" for this whole Blog thing, and I plan to just "wing it". I'm putting myself out there and sharing some of "me" with "you".....you're welcome(please leave the money on the nightstand,before you leave..lol) I hope you all(all 2 of you...lol) ENJOY my blog. If nothing else, I hope it gives you a closer look/feel of exactly who I am and what I am about.So from this day on, I give you me.....